By Livi Player, Arts Editor
Has your most recent and wittiest Bristruth been successful? Here's Epigram Arts' ultimate guide to the art of the perfect Bristruth for those sweet reacts.
Facebook verified top fan badge holder Leah Martindale writes, 'the ultimate Bristruth success relies on at least two of the golden trifecta of posts: humour, relatability, and snappiness. If your post is funny and relatable, we allow excess length - see: the library reviewer. If your post is snappy and relatable, we excuse questionable humour - see: ‘stays on during sex’ gags. If your post is snappy and funny, it doesn’t need to be particularly relatable - see: the ski trip shenanigans. The ultimate Bristruth, however, merges all three of these qualities for a short sharp laugh you’re sure you could have experienced yourself. It is for this reason alone that the 'overheard in Bristol' Bristruths reign supreme, and will live forever, like reviews, substitute for a personality, or phantom lift shitter fads.’
Take these submissions for example. Short, snappy, witty and relatable - because who doesn’t like garlic right? Your degree is basically an expensive book club? No problem! Vegan sausage roll anyone? I for one tagged my flatmates in these witty posts, contributing to my cheeky (but still unclaimed) top fan badge status. Another fad lies with the ‘.... isn’t a substitute for a personality’, which took off on the Bristruth page, and even took off away from the screen - overhearing banterous comments of ‘having pastel highlighters isn’t a substitute for a personality’ in the ASS cafe was one of my personal favourites.
How can we forget the infamous phantom lift shitter of Unite House. Driving away from the need for a short and snappy post, these ones are good long reads. Gaining over 400 likes on its initial posting, the community of Bristruth lapped this one right up. The mystery still remains and the shitter is still on the loose - ready to strike another lift, laundry room or hallway just waiting for that next perfect successful Bristruth. Don't forget the popular Library Reviewer which popped up this January exam season, truly aiding our revision procrastination.
The classic overheard posts. Particularly the laughable Wills comments seem to make a stand out appearance amongst the most successful Bristruths. Whilst quite unrelatable to the average Joe, the pretentious remarks speak for themselves as to their success on the page.
Another classic is ‘yeah sex is good but…’ playing on university stereotypes of sex crazed teenagers finding pleasure in the tittilating moment of discovering you don’t have to do as much work as you thought you did.
There are so many memes, fads, gags and relatable fails posted on Bristruth daily - along with their other sites for the eye-fuckers of Briscrush and the wholesome Brispets for the sad student missing their doggo. The question ‘did you see that Bristruth?’ that I often overhear around campus and the glow of receiving the notification ‘So-and-so has tagged you in a comment’, you know you’re in for a good one. And hey, the feeling of having your Bristruth being posted, better yet being successful and meme worthy, puts a smile on our student faces. Happy Bristruthing.
Featured image credit: Bristruths
Have you ever had a successful Bristruth?