Georgia Marsh takes us through the guilty hopes and horrors of Gilmore Girls in anticipation of its return.
WARNING: SPOILERS FROM SEASONS ONE – SEVEN
The countdown begins! Less than a month until everyone’s favourite mother-daughter duo, Lorelai and Rory Gilmore, return to our (computer) screens on 26th November. Forget about lectures, ditch your seminars: junk food and binge watching 100% encouraged.
1. The real reason we wanted a Gilmore Girls revival: to see Rory – finally – choosing a man!
Okay, yes, it is a completely anti-feminist take on a TV series to assume that jet-setting journalist Rory Gilmore could only ever be truly happy once she settles down with a man, but why else did we want to see a return to Stars Hollow?
After she turned down Logan Huntzberger’s proposal in the final season to follow future President Obama on his 2008 campaign trail, the series ended with a single Rory graduating from Yale and going at the big, wide world alone.
However, the new series revisits each of the major men in her life – loyal yet lame first boyfriend, Dean, troubled bad boy turned New York author Jess and fancy rich kid, Logan. It’s a big decision. Will she end up with one of them or none of them? Only time will tell. It’s likely going to be either Logan or none of them; if it’s not Jess, I feel series creator Amy Sherman-Palladino and I are going to have some serious issues to work through.
2. More Amy Schumer references
It’s been a cold, dark nine years since Gilmore Girls fled our screens. Yet, a few months ago, the first teaser trailer for the Netflix revival emerged like a hot flash of bright light through the clouds.
It’s been a lengthy and lonely amount of time since we’ve been enveloped into the caffeine-fuelled and wittily quipped mother-daughter conversations and, finally arm-in-arm with clever pop culture reference, they’ve returned.
Yet all is not well: the first thing – after nine years - that comes out of Lorelai’s mouth is ‘do you think Amy Schumer would like me?’ To make matters worse, the new clips see Rory referencing Lena Dunham. No thank you, ladies. You’re too good for this and we’ll be having absolutely none of it.
Hey @amy_geek. We got you a little something from Stars Hollow, too. pic.twitter.com/njXBS3TqKm
— Gilmore Girls (@GilmoreGirls) November 10, 2016
3. A fitting tribute to Edward Herrmann
On Christmas Day 2014, Edward Herrmann – who played Rory’s beloved grandfather, Richard Gilmore – sadly passed away after a short illness. Fans are going to be expecting a total sob fest as the Gilmore girls say a tearful goodbye to the cherished character and wonderful actor.
Upon his death Kelly Bishop, who plays his on-screen wife, Emily Gilmore, said: ‘Everyone who knew or worked with Ed found him to be absolutely delightful… Everything looks a little dim, as if the lights went down’. In the trailer for the new series, a voice overhears her say ‘I don’t know how to do this. I was married for fifty years. Half of me is gone.’ Cue the sound of hearts all over the world shattering into a million pieces. It’s a delicate subject, but there’s no doubt that the show will handle it with grace.
4. April Nardini
The most unnecessary character from the worst storyline ever (arguably other than when Rory embarked on a messy affair with married ex-boyfriend Dean in the Season Four finale). She was the catalyst for the Lorelai-Luke break-up in Season Six, thus she is the anti-Christ. You’re not needed here, April. You can definitely leave now.
5. Justice for Lane Kim
As one of only three major POC characters in the entire seven series (eek), Lane Kim had so much promise. She rose from sheltered yet rebellious teenager in a strict Christian household to breakout Rock Star drummer of band Hep Alien (who have been playing real-life shows at various Gilmore Girls festivals in the US).
Rory’s Day One knew how to reach for the stars… until her character was assassinated in the final season. We saw her having to give up her Meg White dreams after falling pregnant to twins on her honeymoon.
It is vital that the new series portrays her both as an amazing mother and drummer of a platinum-selling arena band because, after her unsatisfactory fate in the show’s conclusion, that’s what Lane Kim deserves.
6. Another heart-wrenching break-up
Though they broke up after Luke’s daughter April arrived, the final series saw the romantic reunion of soul mates Lorelai and Luke after an incredibly rough patch (marriage to Christopher, anyone?).
The series ended with the sought-after couple back together and the world of Stars Hollow returning to an idealistic equilibrium. However, the trailer for the new series sees Lorelai rather unconvincingly assure a therapist that her and Luke are happy together as well as looking very pensive on a mountain hike.
What does the future hold for TV’s golden couple? Don’t do this to us again, Amy Sherman-Palladino. We have been through enough already; we just want everyone to be happy!
7. A Gilmore baby?
A promotional poster for the new season was released a few months ago depicting a plate of snacks on the Gilmore’s kitchen table: sweet treats Pop Tarts circling an apple.
Those who are fans of the show will know that the Gilmore girls do not, under any circumstances, eat anything remotely healthy. Fans with exceptionally good memories will remember Lorelai revealing that the only time in her life she’s ever craved an apple was immediately before she found out she was pregnant with Rory. Frenzy ensued as the Internet speculated a possible new family member.
8. The demonization of Emily Gilmore
A large portion of Gilmore Girls focused on Lorelai’s difficult relationship with her mother, Emily Gilmore. Though she was snobby, often irritating and frustratingly meddlesome, she was never really that bad. Sure, she constantly bossed her daughter around, was often cold hearted and attempted to break up Lorelai and Luke, but did she ever deserve the Mussolini comparisons?
Emily is a character as equally complex as her daughter, and all she really craved was a closeness to her family. The new series consists of only four episodes and I’d hate to see any of them focus heavily on the pair’s rocky relationship.
9. A loyal return to Stars Hollow
Of course this show focuses heavily on the lives of the central stars Lorelai and Rory, yet the show would be nothing if not for the entire cast of eccentric characters.
From the quirky townspeople of Stars Hollow to the incomparably brilliant Paris Gellar, fans want to see these characters have enough screen time to capture the original brilliance of the show: they are worth more than a small cameo.
What would a Gilmore Girls revival be without Kirk’s insanity? Or any of Mrs Kim’s quick-witted craziness? A revival not worth watching, in my opinion. Amy Sherman-Palladino has astronomical expectations to live up to, but I believe she can pull it off.
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