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SeekingArrangement sugar coating the reality of student sex work

As part of Epigram’s investigation into student's participating in adult work at the University of Bristol, two reporters signed up to renowned sugar dating site SeekingArrangement.

By Imogen Horton, Editor-and-Chief  & Georgiana Scott, Investigations Editor

As part of Epigram’s investigation into student's participating in adult work at the University of Bristol, two reporters signed up to renowned sugar dating site SeekingArrangement.

For forty-eight hours our journalists spoke to sugar daddies over the sites messaging service and received offers for potential ‘arrangements’.

Within minutes of uploading a profile photo, both reporters began to receive messages from not only the Bristol area, but the rest of the UK and even worldwide.

During the time frame, they received a combined total of 98 messages and 221 ‘interests’ from men on the site. ​

Despite SeekingArrangement stating that their members are looking for ‘hypergamous relationships’, many men were looking for transactional relationships, mostly in the form of 'pay-per-meets.'

Pay-per-meets or 'PPM's', are known in the adult work industry as engaging in sexual activities for one-off payments.

One message received by both reporters said ‘Hi, want to do vid call sex I’ll give you 300 u free now what’s your wats app’. Another Sugar Daddy asked one reporter if she minded not using condoms. ​However, many were more careful not to be explicit about what they were looking for, instead using language such as ‘overnight stays’, ‘intimate meets’ or ‘adult needs’ to soften the reality of what they were expecting.

One Sugar Daddy opened communications with, ‘Women often complain that men only want one thing. On this site that’s probably true, people just express it differently. Are you up for that sort of arrangement?’​

Statistics on the sugar daddies that contacted our reporters | Epigram / Georgiana Scott 

Other offers both reporters received ranged from being flown to Thailand for a ‘beach weekend’, to a week of ‘intimate fun’ in Luxembourg, to a threesome with a man, his wife, and his wife’s Italian boyfriend. ​

Upon SeekingArrangements’s recommendation, the majority of their sugar daddy’s were only willing to discuss the financial aspects of an arrangement over WhatsApp. However, out of those who did, 70% said they were looking for PPM’s.

Messages on SeekingArrangement / Georgiana Scott | Epigram

Very few men on the site, if none at all, seemed to be genuinely interested in a hypergamous relationship. ​

'Other offers both reporters received ranged from being flown to Thailand for a ‘beach weekend’, to a week of ‘intimate fun’ in Luxembourg, to a threesome with a man, his wife, and his wife’s Italian boyfriend.'

A common theme among the men they encountered was the need to assert dominance.  One reporter was immediately asked if she was ‘obedient’. ​There was a clear power imbalance from the start, which only got worse when age and the potential financial transaction was factored in. ​

Both reporters also found the men they spoke to, to be pressuring, with some becoming rude if they took too long to reply. When one reporter took longer than five minutes to reply, she was met with the message: ‘It’s a shame you aren’t polite enough to say ‘thanks but not my type’ or similar. As you haven’t come back I’ve started chatting with someone else.’​ Some also disconcertingly spoke of their wives and children, who were mostly unaware of their online advances.​

SeekingArrangement has been contacted for comment. ​

Featured Image: Epigram / Georgiana Scott


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