The reality of excessive drinking

An anonymous student writes about their experience with university drinking culture, in particular with reference to excessive drinking in order to highlight the worrying reality and effect it can have on your physical and mental wellbeing.

I suddenly jolt up. It’s 10am, I’m drowning in sweat and I’m wearing an old dirty t-shirt. Clumsily, I reach over for the 2- day old glass of water on my windowsill and take a large gulp to attempt to quench my Sahara Desert like mouth. Then suddenly it hits me, the crippling stomach cramps and severe nausea I know I’ll be battling with for the entire day. In a sudden panic, I grab my bag beside my bed, not before catching my horrific appearance in the mirror and then proceeding to manically look through it. Phone? Check. ID? Check. Bank card? There. Headphones? Check. Like a miracle, I’ve come back with everything. Then comes the wave of hangxiety. What happened last night? How did I get home? Did I do anything stupid?

It happened again, I blacked out.

We live in a culture where binge drinking and drinking until the point of blackout is not only normalised but encouraged. Drank a bottle of vodka and passed out at a party? That’s hilarious. Drank so much you ended up getting your stomach pumped? That sucks! But it’s a story to tell. Alcohol is one of the only legal, widely available drugs, so it’s no wonder that the UK comes in the top three binge drinking cultures in Europe. But both the horrific long-term and short-term effects, though heavily scientifically and medically documented, are not widely accepted amongst (especially) the younger generations.

Photo by Epigram / Luke Unger

To be clear- I’m not saying I haven’t been part of it. As many of my friends are aware, I have a history of regretful decisions; sleeping with someone with no memory of it, having to be carried home, making a general ass of myself and a whole other plethora of embarrassing stories behind my back. Every time after a blackout-binge I’d wake up with the familiar taste of regret and guilt, yet I continued and continued, a vicious cycle that lasted months. I lived for the night. It took me a long time to realise and come to terms with the fact that my drinking habits were becoming problematic. Having suffered from anxiety issues all my life, turning to alcohol became a quick and easy relief. I’m not the only one. I strongly believe drinking problems amongst university students are far more widespread that people think, but because it’s so normalised many people don’t even realise.

Every time after a blackout-binge I'd wake up with a familiar taste of regret and guilt, yet I continued and continued, a vicious cycle that lasted months.

For me, it was after a particularly traumatic night of heavy drinking and drugs and the night that I got sexually assaulted, that I decided, an emotional mess the next day, that this had to stop and I had to cut down. It still makes me angry that it had to come to such an awful thing happening that finally pushed me to make change. I decided that I had had enough. Enough of wasting entire days feeling, quite literally, like every cell in my body had been poisoned, wasting huge amounts of money and mostly had enough of continuing to do something which I knew was having a heavy impact on both my physical and mental health.

Photo by Epigram / Luke Unger

I still drink, and often. But I’m working on it, I’m more in control of my intake and no longer blackout multiple times a week or feel like my life is void of meaning without a night of drinking ahead of me. I feel so much better for it, slowly but surely, I’m replacing hungover days with productive plans and slowly started incorporating exercise into my life and it’s made all the difference so far. It’s not really had much of an impact on my social life - if anything I’m more social as I spend less time lying in bed feeling sorry for myself.

I’m not taking a complete stance against nights out and parties, they’re still some of my favourite past times. I’m just here to remind you that alcohol, as normalised and widespread as it may be, really does come with dangers and cutting down, if you’re a heavy binge drinker like I was, could really bring positive changes to your life.

Featured Image: Epigram / Jasmine Burke