I Saw The TV Glow: A Tale of Selfhood

By Maisie MacDonald, Third Year, Geography

I Saw The TV Glow is Jane Schoenbrun’s coming of age film following the ever-distant Owen (Justice Smith, Ian Foreman) through three stages of life. The scared and shy Owen perpetually appears to be struggling with his family and social life. However, through forming a friendship with fellow weird kid Maddy (Brigette Lundy-Paine), he develops a fascination with The Pink Opaque, a TV show reminiscent of Buffy The Vampire Slayer. The big bad of The Pink Opaque is the aptly named Mr Melancholy. The pair become entangled with the show with the lines between reality and fiction becoming blurred which builds throughout.

Maddy and Owen are both outcasts and find solace in The Pink Opaque. Consuming the show allows them to explore themselves and exist in a place and self other than being sad teens in suburbia. Through identifying with one of the characters Owen is able to explore himself and his identity. However, we see him at odds with the act of exploration. This terrifying and dangerous choice of whether to escape the confines of one’s situation and run away to be their authentic selves presents itself. However, the safe and comfortable option to stay and conform to societal expectations is also explored and the consequences of this. What happens if you deny yourself?

The film’s repeated motifs and items lends itself to a rewatch to notice how The Pink Opaque may have been surrounding the protagonists throughout. The bisexual palette is enough to make anyone jealous and offers feelings of nostalgia even if it is a tad predictable for a film of this genre and themes. The featuring of liminal spaces throughout, from schools after dark to arcades, multiplies the nostalgic elements of the aesthetic. The cinematography is paired with stereotypical sad girl music from an impressive array of artists such as Phoebe Bridgers and Caroline Polachek.

Jane Schoenbrun has created a powerful trans allegory through this exploration of selfhood and what happens when you suppress the self. In a way the choice of breaking out and going beyond is reminiscent of The Matrix but I Saw the TV Glow goes a step further in its perceptibility as a “trans film”. Characters are shown to know they are different and feel uncomfortable in their own skin but be stuck with an inadequate vocabulary to express their feelings and the fear of what happens when one takes a step towards reconciling the current and true self.

This film is sure to leave viewers wondering what is Owen and Maddy’s reality and what only exists in their mind.

Featured Image courtesy of IMDb

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