Bristol students can claim Oxbridge degree in latest Uni coronavirus policy

By Patrick Sullivan, Co-Editor-In-Chief

Happy April Fool's Day! Epigram can confirm this story is the latest in our annual tradition along with other newspapers.

Ensuring all news is accurate and trustworthy, especially with uncertainty of the COVID-19 outbreak, is crucial for informing our student readers and the wider public. All of our COVID-19 coverage can be found via our dedicated tag here.

After pressure from students, the University of Bristol have said that degrees will be given the extra status of being from Oxford or Cambridge due to the unprecedented effects of the pandemic.

The global outbreak of COVID-19 has left many students worrying about their ability to achieve their desired grades with no physical access to the world class facilities or staff usually associated with the University of Bristol.

To ease their concerns about the future value of degrees, University senior management have updated their policies so that final year students can list either Oxford or Cambridge as their university rather than Bristol. It is another element to the assessment strategy, and comes after they previously suggested ‘no detriment’ and ‘minimisation’.

The University communicated the important new message to students by both fax and Morse Code, following complaints that the email system previously used ‘was difficult to understand and featured too many words’.

‘While Bristol isn't a copycat like Durham University, it fundamentally is the same standard of education and experience as Oxbridge but with better nightlife.’
A senior source from the University

A senior source from the University said the policy is ‘proof that the institution listens to what the students want, even in these unprecedented times’. They went on to say that ‘while Bristol isn't a copycat like Durham University, it fundamentally is the same standard of education and experience as Oxbridge but with better nightlife’.

‘If a student is disappointed with their final degree mark, the extra status of Oxford or Cambridge University should ease the stress of missing out on a higher grade without sacrificing academic rigour.’

The numerical mark and grade classification themselves, however, will remain unchanged.

Students had been vocal since the University shut early for Easter, with over 2,000 even filling out a form on the MyBristol portal voting the Oxbridge policy as their preferred mitigation. Another student vote confirmed Oxford Union as the new name for Senate House.

| Students criticise UoB ‘no detriment’ policy as ‘unclear’ and ‘unfairly applied’

Lord Finchley, a final year Bristol student was ‘ecstatic’ about the announcement. ‘I can finally go back home now knowing I've fulfilled my childhood dream of receiving an Oxbridge degree and made my parents proud.’

Another student blamed Coronavirus for failing their Trinity College interview three years ago, saying they had ‘seen the 2015 Bill Gates TED Talk the night before and was concerned about whether they would go to South-East Asia again’.

‘I thought I’d missed out because of the virus so it is reassuring to know my hard work will be rewarded.

‘I’ve been bitter about the timing of the interview for years now and, while I'm sad to be missing out on final moments with the friends I’ve made here, I'm happy with the final outcome.’

Oxford and Cambridge University released a joint statement and said they are ‘happy to donate some of their excess prestige to help combat the effects of Coronavirus’.

Not all students are satisfied. One told Epigram they ‘never wanted to be associated with Oxbridge’ and that ‘testing should be strictly done using online BuzzFeed style quizzes’.

‘I'm the type of person who prefers prosecco to champagne,’ they said.

Featured image: Unsplash / Sidharth Bhatia