Student counselling: one year on

By Bobbie Cattani, Third Year, Biology

Last year, Bobbie Cattani wrote about her negative experience with the student counselling services. This year, she tried again with the services, and writes about what has changed.

Around a year ago I had my first appointment at student counselling and it did not go well at all. In an article, I wrote about my experience and why I did not think I would ever go back. It took another year until I had the courage to seek help again, bringing it to at least 8 years that I have suffered with my depression, body image and the whole range of issues that come with the two.

I finally decided (again) that I didn’t want to live life feeling as if I was being tortured, and worse, believing that I deserved it. Once again, I referred myself to student counselling. My telephone appointment for an initial assessment was a few weeks later and I was nervous, skeptical and terrified of what it would be like after last time. The man I spoke to could not have been nicer; I felt able to be open in a supportive, non-judgmental environment. It was what I wanted my therapy experience to be the first time.

A few weeks later I was offered an appointment with one of the counsellors. I was nervous, in general, but also because of the last time. She sensed this and instantly addressed it; making it clear I was in control and didn’t have to talk about anything I didn’t want to, and stressed I was absolutely free to leave and request a different therapist if I wanted.

One bad experience is not worth sacrificing your opportunity to get support.

Although apprehensive, throughout the session I found myself being more open and comfortable than I have been with anyone except my closest friends. It was everything I had wanted my therapy experience to be; everything I had given up hope of when my first session went so badly.

While I do not feel like I made a mistake in refusing to see my therapist from last year again, if I had only known that it wasn't going to be like that again, I may have persevered and asked to try a different therapist. At least, I may have tried again sooner rather than later. Hindsight is 20:20, and a big part of me regrets putting myself, and more importantly, those close to me, through another year of mental breakdowns, panic attacks and the depression that plagues my everyday life. That is why I wanted to write this article: plenty of people last hear told me it would be ok, that other counsellors were great, that I should go back. But it was hard for me to believe because they had not experienced the things I had; they did not know how terrible it felt to feel so let down after one session.

If you need to see three different people before you feel comfortable, do so. It is your health and it is you that is important.

So, if you are thinking about asking for help for any mental health issue, please do ask Student Counselling, Bristol well-being therapies or the student health service. If you have or had a bad experience, do persevere. Take it from someone who had a horrible experience; one bad experience is not worth sacrificing your opportunity to get support. Ask to see someone different (email if you don’t want to call), and if you need to see three different people before you feel comfortable, do so. It is your health and it is you that is important.

Ultimately, I am relieved and thankful that I returned to Student Counselling. I had thought it was futile: surely all the therapists would be the same within the same organisation, but I am not afraid to admit that I was wrong. It was a hard lesson to learn, but one thing going wrong does not mean that all hope is lost. I still have a long way to go, but I am finally moving forward with my recovery.

Featured Image: Epigram / Jasmine Burke